The following is this month's topic for Moments in Motherhood:
What is your opinion concerning girls calling boys? Depending on the ages of your children, did/do/will you let your daughters call boys? How do you feel about girls calling your son(s)?
When I was growing up in my parents' home, it was understood that girls didn't call boys. Any guys that I ever called were most definitely friends only
: nothing remotely romantic in nature, only study partners, buddies. I talked to my girlfriends all the time, but I knew I wasn't supposed to be calling boys I was "interested in." It just wasn't proper. Call me old-fashioned (and I'll take that as a compliment, thankyouverymuch), but I still feel the same way.
My 12-year-old son currently has three girls who call him. He was painfully shy for most of his life, but he's come out of it for the most part. Maybe it's that strong, silent-type thing. I don't know. All I know is that he's not doing any of the calling and gets off the phone as soon as I tell him.
I'm still looking for the perfect way to handle this. We've had times when girls have called our older sons. Once I was home sick from church and the only one in the house. A girl whom I didn't like calling our oldest son called around 30 times in a 45 minute period. Since no one was answering (I didn't), I guess she wanted to catch him the moment he walked in the door. It was making me nuts! When my family got home I discussed the situation (not just that day's calls, but all of them) with my husband, and he answered the phone and had a nice but instructive conversation with the girl. She never called again.
I don't know the ones who are calling now very well, but they seem like nice girls. My thought is that their mothers (and especially their daddies) don't have a clue what's happening. I'm not sure if I should talk to their mothers or the girls themselves. I've been in that position before, when someone tells you something that you really needed to know about your child but didn't want to hear, and I don't relish the thought of putting another mom (or two, or three) in that same boat. On the other hand, should I be the one discussing it with the girls? It always catches me off guard when they call.
My oldest daughter is 10, so I haven't experienced this from the other side. I've been giving her fair warning of what's expected, although I'm not naive enough to assume that's the end of the discussion.
What are your thoughts and experiences in this area? If you post something on your blog, please come back and link your post to my Mr. Linky.
Labels: Moments in Motherhood