The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new. ~Rajneesh
As a mother of eight who hopes to one day become certified as a childbirth educator and/or birth doula, I am fascinated by pregnancy, birth, and motherhood. I have really enjoyed the Woman to Woman writing project that Morning Glory and Lei have started. For me, exploring my feelings and experiences through writing can be very enlightening, even cathartic.
One of the greatest things about blogging is meeting so many interesting women. Sometimes I am reaffirmed by like-minded bloggers, sometimes my eyes are opened by a fresh perspective. I am interested in starting a writing project and hearing what others have to say about different aspects of motherhood. If there is an interest, I will host this on the first Fridays of the month, starting next Friday, April 6. I'll put up a Mr. Linky; please link to your Moments in Motherhood post, rather than your blog itself.
Here is the first topic, for next Friday, April 6:
Was birth an empowering experience for you? Do you agree with the statement "you birth the way you live"? Did your birth experience(s) impact you in a long-term way?
I hope one or all of these questions set your mental wheels churning. Feel free to grab my button, or email me if you'd like the code for a button with link. Please spread the word! I'm excited to hear what you have to say.
Five-year-old son: "When I grow up, I want to be a dollah."
Me: "A dollar?"
Five-year-old son: "Yes, a dollah."
Three-year-old daughter: "When I grow up, I want to be a doctor."
Seven-year-old daughter: "When I grow up, I want to work at Target."
Five-year-old son: "When I grow up, I want to be a rich guy." (which of course must be easier than actually being a dollar) Seven-year-old daughter:"Mom, did you know vanilla isn't actually blonde, it's brown?"
Me (after dressing Lily): "Okay, now--you're good to go!"
Three-year-0ld daughter, looking down at her pajamas: "Oh! I forgot to get good to go!"
I saw this over at Barb's the other day and I thought I'd play. If you go to here, you can have your blog critiqued. Here's my review:
I love blogs that are full of life and give you a warm feeling of family. Now this family is full of 8 children which makes it a little more of a full family, but I think big families are the best! I had a friend growing up who had 10 brothers and sisters, 2 cousins, and an uncle all living in the same house. I live in a little neighborhood, needless to say they had the biggest house there. As for this fantastic blog, you will find lots of family photos and stories about family and thoughts and ideas the blogger has. All that a blog should be. Only thing I didn't notice was some kind of site counter...it's nice to see how many people are stopping by your Home sweet home. Nice job and keep up the great work!
Just to set the record straight, I actually do have a sitemeter, it's just not publicly viewable (I think it's hidden under the navbar). I get way too much of a kick out of the google searches to eliminate it.
When I first started blogging, I came across a YouTube video of a Japanese t-shirt folding method. I couldn't understand a word of it, but after repeated viewings some of my kids and I mastered the technique and in our enthusiasm even taught it to others. When cold weather arrived we discovered that this method doesn't work well for long sleeves (at least it didn't for us) and we quit using it. My sixteen-year-old son and I just realized that we'd forgotten it, and thus began the technorati search which lead to the following helpful and delightful video, in which a cute kid explains the Japanese method and more--all in English!
If after watching the above video you are motivated to build your own t-shirt folding "machine," watch this:
Ryan: America has voted. Sanjaya, you are safe. Sundance, you're going home.
Mommy Dearest: Inconceivable!
Two weeks ago...
Ryan: America has voted. Sanjaya, you are safe. Brandon, you're going home.
Mommy Dearest: Inconceivable!
Last week... Ryan: America has voted. Stephanie, you're going home.
Mommy Dearest: How the #@*& did Sanjaya stay out of the bottom two? Inconceivable!
Inigo Montoya: You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.
America, please, for the love of all that is decent: MAKE IT STOP TONIGHT! Mothers of preteen daughters: HIDE THE PHONES! My 10-year-old daughter embarrasses me herself everywhere she goes since she's willing to fight to the death to defend her teenage heartthrob. At least she doesn't cry.
My kids have spent the week crooning the immortal questions: What's your name? Who's your daddy?
This week's topic for Morning Glory's Woman to Woman writing project is:
Is It Really a Family Night Out?
What are your views regarding children under age 5 attending formal events such as funerals, concerts, and weddings? What about church services? What tips or tricks have you developed that make these events go well for you and your little ones?
Obviously having a large family and a steady supply of little ones affects my opinion and practice in this area. My children have attended many funerals. If they didn't know the person or I have babysitting available, I might not take them; otherwise we all go. Sometimes I've found the best solution is to attend the visitation instead of the funeral.
The kids attend weddings with us, too. We have actually been invited to three weddings on the same Saturday next month, and time-wise it is conceivable that we could make them all. I would like to find babysitting for our one-, three-, and five-year-olds, because I think it would be too much for them. I have friends whose relatives are able to keep their kids during weddings, and they are able to have "wedding dates"--how romantic! That's a wonderful option if it's available to you, if not, my advice is to always respect others by keeping your children quiet or removing them if necessary.
As far as church services go, our children have always attended with us. We don't have a nursery: we worship as a family. This is an area where child-training is essential. As I said before, remove a noisy child. The goal, however, is to train your children to remain quiet and still during services. Will you hear every word of every sermon? Heavens, no! Just remember: they're your children and it's your responsibility to train them; you'll both reap the rewards when they learn self-control and self-discipline. This weekly training pays off in the other situations (funerals, concerts, weddings), too.
There will come a day when I won't have little ones. I'll soak up sermons; cry through weddings (and not because I'm in the lobby with a fussy baby); truly reflect and remember during funerals, without distraction. That time isn't now. The worst thing I could do is feel sorry for myself about what I'm missing. I'm not saying I've never done it--I have--but it's a dangerous trap for a mother to fall into, one that leads to discouragement and discontent, emotional quicksand for mothers.
To see what others have to say on this topic, visit Morning Glory!
Today was my Great-Aunt Mayme's 95th birthday! We have a 3-day annual meeting at church this weekend, so we threw a surprise birthday party/card shower for her this afternoon between services.
Earlier I told you a little bit about Aunt Mayme. At lunch we recalled some classic Aunt Mayme garage sale moments. Aunt Mayme could have been a professional garage sale holder. As a matter of fact, the family feared the authorities were going to show up some day and require her to get a business license; her sales were so frequent and lucrative. I would love to know how many thousands of dollars she generated for the family over the years out of her garage. Once, a lady was having difficulty finding her purse to pay for her purchases. Aunt Mayme had sold it to another customer, who was in the process of driving away with it.
The sweetest thing for me was communion this afternoon. I took communion with my great-aunt and my 7-year-old daughter. What a treasured moment in time to wash the feet of family representing both my past and my future. Aunt Mayme commented on how special it was for her as a 95-year-old woman to be able to take communion with her great-great niece.
Here are some photos of the day, including my Great-Aunt Mayme, Aunt Linda, and I; and the one on bottom also includes my dad and as many of my kids as we were able to grab at the time.
Henceforth, my fifteen-year-old son will be referred to as my sixteen-year-old son. We had so many things to do on his birthday Thursday--last day of homeschool co-op, chorus classes, baseball game--but I always take the kids out to eat on their birthday. We were so busy getting the other kids taken care of after co-op that he forgot and ate two hotdogs, so all he got was a birthday ice cream cone. I owe you a lunch, Stack!
Hubby Dearest celebrates the big 40 today! I am one year and five days older than he is, and this is the first year in... well, the first year ever that he hasn't rubbed in our age difference for the entire five days. He put a new pump/motor in my washing machine last night (we haven't been able to do laundry since last Wednesday) so this is a happy day for everyone! Bun, we have dinner reservations for 6:00. If you have trouble finding me, I may be passed out from exhaustion in the laundry room floor. I love you!
I'm a couple of days late for a venture that Morning Glory started this week; it is a twice monthly writing project for women bloggers called "Woman to Woman." This topic, the first, is entitled "In this skin" in which you tell how aging has affected you personally, your attitude towards it and what you've learned from it.
I look back at my twenties and thank God and my family for having patience with me. I was married and had my first three children in that decade, but I think I was a bit of a mess. We struggled financially and unfortunately I didn't cope well. I think I spent a lot of time submerged in books because I had trouble dealing with reality. That's hard to admit, but I think there's a lot of truth in it.
I had a difficult time turning thirty (I guess I should say dealing with turning thirty!); however, my thirties were very prolific: five of my eight children were born then (at ages thirty, thirty-three, thirty-five, thirty-seven, and thirty-nine), and I definitely preferred them to my twenties. For years the age thirty-three had a special significance for me because that was Christ's age when He was crucified. I imagined it as an important year. My fourth child (and first daughter) was conceived the week of my thirty-third birthday; carrying a child and giving birth was such a special way to spend that year for me.
Turning forty didn't bother me a bit. Tomorrow is my forty-first birthday. I know I've talked a lot lately about losing my mother three years ago and how it's affected me. One thing I haven't mentioned is how it pushed me into new territory. My mother and I were very close and she was a strong influence in my life. I counted on her advice, but I never realized how shaped I was by it until she was gone. My mother dislike hydrangeas; she thought those big, blue blossoms were just tacky! The summer after she passed, I admitted to myself for the first time that I actually like hydrangeas, and I bought two of them and planted them in our yard. I wasn't snubbing my mother's memory, but rather honoring a change that was taking place: making decisions independent of her feedback. This is not the same as her influence, which will always be with me. She also disliked the color orange. She'd once had an unpleasant surgery and her room was in a hospital wing which was decorated orange. I now own orange clothing, etc., and see it as a happy color. The bad connection is no longer there for me; it was hers.
I am content right where I am, right here in this skin. Going back to another time would not only remove the presence of some of my children in my life, but strip away the knowledge, wisdom, and experience that time has layered on my body and soul. Laugh lines and stretch marks are there for good reason!
(This is a published article: I didn't write it!) God bless you! Whether it's pollen or a spring cold, there's a whole lot of sneezing going on.
What makes us sneeze? In addition to being a symptom of an underlying condition, such as allergies and colds, we sneeze when something irritates the membrane of the nose. Here are some of the reasons we sneeze, according to the Gale Encyclopedia of Alternative Medicine and Discovery.com:
Foreign object in the nose, including particles of pepper, smoke, irritating chemical fumes, or gases
Withdrawal from opiate drugs
Stepping outdoors into bright sunlight, which even has a scientific name: Autosomal Dominant Compelling Helio-Ophthalmic Outburst Syndrome
Tweezing your eyebrows
Combing your hair
Rubbing the inner corner of your eye
Eating too much
Why you sneeze the way you do It's in your genes, reports Discovery.com. Whether you sneeze once, twice, or thrice, you're genetically programmed this way so don't even think about trying to change it. "In my family it's three sneezes," says sneeze expert Roberta Pagon, a professor at the University of Washington School of Medicine, "but someone else's family had eight." She said one of her sneezing subjects always sneezed 43 times when first exposed to bright sunlight.
How many times do YOU sneeze? Find your special sneezing pattern in this poem and see what you get for it: One for sorrow Two for joy Three for a letter Four for a boy. Five for silver Six for gold Seven for a secret, never to be told.
Why we say "God bless you" after someone else sneezes The pope said so. That is, Pope Gregory the Great, who lived from 540 to 604 AD, said so. He happened to ascend to the Papacy just as the Bubonic plague took hold. Saying "God bless you" after someone sneezed was literally that--a blessing. Straightdope.com reports that when people sneezed, they were immediately blessed with a "God bless you" as a prayer to prevent them from getting the plague.
Sneezing superstitions (and none is true):
Sneezing expels the soul.
Your heart stops.
Your eyes will pop out if you keep them open while you sneeze.
Sneezing before breakfast is a sign you'll get exciting news before the end of the day.
{this and that} won the copy of Norton Antivirus 2007 that I donated through the Ultimate Blog Party, and Melissa Mae won the recipe journal/organizer from the drawing I posted on my own blog party post. Melissa is actually one of my real-life friends, but I promise the drawing wasn't rigged. It was nice from a shipping aspect--I hand-delivered her organizer today!
Melissa has been patiently waiting for me to finish designing her website for selling girls hair bows. Most people don't have to wait for their web designer to read two books and learn two high-tech programs while their site is being created. I guess Melissa is just lucky that way--NOT! At least I did manage to give her blog a makeover. Love you, girl--be patient!
I have felt much more peace this year after posting about my mother two weeks ago. This upcoming Friday it will be three years since she passed away; it will also be my 41st birthday.
When I found out I was expecting my eighth child, I was stunned: it didn't seem possible that I could be having another child with my mother not here. Obviously my body was not aware of this complication, but my mind was. There were times when I would think, "Lord, why did you give me eight children when my mother is gone?" You see, my mother was always accessible, concerned, and involved in my life. When I had a really tough day with one of the kids and was at the end of my proverbial rope, all I had to do was call Mother, explain the situation, and put her on the phone with the errant child. After much silence interspersed with "okays" and "yes, ma'ams," I usually saw much behavioral improvement. My mother had that kind of effect on people. She asked my dad once why everyone in the family asked her opinion on things that didn't involve her, and he explained that she was very wise and everyone respected her opinion.
Having your mother pass away on your birthday is not an easy thing. On the first anniversary of her death I was in a funk all day, sort of aimless and unfocused. My oldest son kept telling me to call a friend to meet me, or just get in the car and go do something (I think I was making him a little nuts). You know what happened though? My aunt and cousin sent me absolutely gorgeous flowers and my husband surprised me by coming home early from work and taking me to the movies. Last year, the second anniversary, I had a surprise party for my 40th birthday at an Italian restaurant. My church sisters really did a great job planing this, because I was completely clueless (maybe that's a state of mind and not a circumstance).
One thing that really sticks with me is this: shortly before my birthday last year a friend emailed me and said, "Your mother would want you to be happy." Nothing could be more true. Instead of my birthday being just another day, I have seen that people are especially kind because they know the significance the day holds for me. If you think about it, stop by and say hello this Friday!
When I wrote the post about my mother, I couldn't walk away until I'd finished. My husband and I were almost late to the movies; we saw Amazing Grace on opening night. Speaking of amazing grace, I'm thankful for a Saviour who said, "My graceissufficient for thee," a Saviour of whom it was said, " And she shall bring forth a son, and thou shalt call his name JESUS: for he shall save his people from their sins." I am thankful that verse did not say, "He shall facilitate the saving of his people from their sins," or "He shall initiate the saving of his people from their sins." I cannot be trusted with something as small as making sure my kids have shoes on their feet (my dear friend Trina can confirm that our family attended a talent show/spaghetti supper last night and two of my children arrived without shoes). What a blessing to know their salvation is in my Lord's hands and not mine. I serve a big God, a powerful God, a God who doesn't need my assistance to accomplish His will--a risen Saviour who declared, "It is finished." Put your trust in Him and rest easy in that promise.
Have you ever posted a comment on a blogger blog and needed to go back and view the post, so you copied your comment so that you wouldn't lose it and then hit the back button, reread the post and then hit the forward button, pasted your comment back in the comment box, and then happened to notice on the comments page that underneath the title of the post it says "Show Original Post," which displays the post on the comments page, making you realize that you have performed a completely unnecessary and time-wasting cutting and pasting ritual hundreds of times?
My observant and painfully honest three-year-old daughter sat behind me this morning while I was fixing my hair. At one point she said, "Mommy, your bottom is bigger."
Foolishly and with trepidation I said, "Bigger than what?"
"Bigger."
"Bigger than what?" [Did I ever mention that I'm a glutton for punishment?]
"Bigger."
I finally realized that I wasn't going to get a "bigger than a breadbox" kind of answer; what she was trying to say was "bigger than the last time I noticed."
It goes without saying that parenting isn't for cowards. Let me assure you that it isn't for those with much need of ego stroking, either.
MomRN2 at My Quiet Corner is asking a series of questions for feedback this week during the blog party. Here are her latest questions and my answers:
How do you define blogging? If you were to describe it to another person, what is it for you personally? Do you have specific goals or a purpose with your blogging? If so, would you mind sharing?
First, blogging is my personal journal, a memory-keeper for myself and my family. My mother passed away three years ago this month. After she was gone, I searched everywhere for cards, recipes, anything she had written. She would have been an amazing blogger! I like the idea of leaving something like this for my kids.
Second, I love the community of bloggers and the friends I've made. That was a totally unexpected perk of blogging, something I didn't understand about it before I started.
Third, I loved writing in school; it's something I miss. I find deep satisfaction in expressing my thoughts in writing.
Fourth, I feel like I'm keeping in touch with friends and family. I've discovered that friends that I didn't even know were aware of the blog's existence read it, if only occasionally.
What does blogging mean to you? Are there any of you who don't blog but enjoy reading blogs?
The Ultimate Blog Party begins today, hosted by 5 Minutes for Mom. What is a blog party, you ask? It's a great opportunity to meet other bloggers and win prizes! I am a prize host, #10 on the American-only list. I'm giving away Norton Antivirus 2007, so if you're feeling less than secure head over to the prize page and choose it. Check here to find out how to improve your chances of getting the prize you want.
Welcome to my little corner of the blogosphere. I'm a SAHM of eight kids, with a love for blogging, creating things on my computer, hanging out with the best church family ever, and watching whatever my kids are doing at the time. Soccer moms get their own title, but we're not into soccer, so I guess I'm a baseball/basketball/chorus sort of mom.
I just got this great idea from the Preacher's Wife: to encourage de-lurking, I'll offer a prize from a random drawing from comments left this week. I would tell you what the prize is, but that would imply that I'd had time to put some heavy thought into it, which unfortunately isn't the case... I promise, "whatever it is, it's a nice one!"
UPDATE: I HAVE A PRIZE!
Last weekend I bought the New York City Ballet Complete Workout, which enables me to be beaten up one side and down the other--all in the privacy of my own home!--by the world-renowned NYC Ballet. In the midst of yesterday's fiasco workout, I almost decided that those videos would be a perfect prize. On second thought, I've decided I should stick with it for more than a week before giving it away, so here is the actual prize, selected by my 10-year-old daughter:
This is a recipe organizer with 100 journal pages and 4 divider tabs, perfect for saving and organizing your favorite recipes. I don't know about you, but I've found some fabulous recipes on blogs.
A few months ago I found out that Harry was coming to town and that tickets were going on sale that weekend. My husband works with a guy with ticket connections, so I asked him to please beg for some tickets, especially since the concert is so close to our birthdays (mine and my husband's are five days apart). You may ask why I didn't just buy them right away for myself, and I would tell you that mothers of eight are extremely frugal and don't go around buying concert tickets, especially when they discover that ticket prices have increased since the early 80's.
Three months have gone by, and no tickets. My husband's friend assured us that there is always a block of about 60 really good seats which are reserved for the performer's use, and that any unused tickets are released at the last minute. I have bookmarked the ticketmaster page for this concert and check it daily, crossing my fingers and saying a little prayer that two of those golden tickets would be ours.
Well, today is my lucky day! While sitting here in the parking lot during my kids' chorus classes, "borrowing" the unsecured wireless signal from the local vet hospital, I made my daily check and lo and behold THERE WERE MY TICKETS--in the orchestra section (the best seats) no less! We are now the proud owners of two tickets to hear one of my favorite singers ever and to top it all off, the concert is next week! WOO HOO!
Was birth an empowering experience for you? Do you agree with the statement "you birth the way you live"? Did your birth experience(s) impact you in a long-term way?
